Face Off: “F*@k You” Watches

Seeing as we don’t have two people in the same place, here at Wound For Life, we’ve started using a group chat to manage the site and getting our daily dose of watch talk and geekery. Through the chat, many important decisions regarding our personal collections have been made, but every once and a while, we come across a question that both makes us laugh, and really gets us thinking. This past week, the topic of so called “F*@k You” watches (a category which we agreed covers pieces that are highly mechanically sophisticated, yet bold and by no means subtle) came up, so I’ve gone and put together a list of some of the best around, all for your enjoyment. So take a break, put your feet up, and feast your eyes on a range of no-nonsense, vibrant, wallet murdering, and envy inspiring F*@k You watches.

IWC Big Pilot Perpetual Calendar Top Gun

Photo courtesy of RedBar co-founder and friend of the site, Adam Craniotes (@craniotes).

Though some — including myself at times — will argue that IWC’s current lineup has become clouded by their marketing, 2015’s collection does still contain some genuinely great watches. Case and point – the Big Pilot’s Perpetual Calendar Top Gun. At 48mm wide, it certainly lives up to the “Big” name, but it’s the combination of their legendary perpetual calendar caliber with the distinct appearance of the Top Gun colorway that makes this piece worthy of its true badass status. I could see someone comfortably dominating the world with a watch like this on the wrist.

Rolex Daytona Ref. 6265/8

Photo courtesy of H.Q. Milton

Many individuals will regard the early Daytona’s as some of the best proportioned watches ever designed, in that they wear quite prominently on the wrist, while still being rather subdued at just 37mm wide. In the case of the next watch up, I’m not exactly sure the word “subdued” fits the bill, because, well, it’s a gold Rolex! What we’re dealing with here is a 6265 with “/8” added at the end of the reference, designating the complete use of yellow gold. When offered with the black dial and contrasting subdials, this piece has a real rock star vibe to it, that’s pretty in your face, and I’m perfectly alright with that. I would certainly welcome one of these into my own collection if given the chance.

JLC Master Compressor Diving Pro Geographic NAVY Seals

If you’re on the hunt for a real dive watch, durability, legibility, and functionality should be at the top of your list, without a doubt. So now, put all of those ideals somewhat aside, and take a look at JLC’s Master Compression Diving Pro Geographic Navy SEALs. Now that we’ve gotten past that mouthful of a name, let’s talk about 46.3mm rose gold dive watches that have multiple time zones and mechanical depth gauges (that cost $50,000). I can almost guarantee that none of these watches have ever really seen the water, or ever will for that matter, but that’s almost the great part about it. It’s just a killer piece, designed without the word restraint in question, and did I mention that Navy SEALs apparently wear these?

Patek Philippe Ref. 5101P

Because we’re talking about F*@k You watches, it’s almost a given that a tourbillon is going to come up. Over the past ten years or so, the tourbillon has turned into the ultimate complication in the minds of many collectors, and while I don’t necessarily agree with that notion, I still appreciate tourbillons immensely for the works of art that they are. This brings us to the 5101P — a Patek reference with some serious mechanical chops. To sum it up briefly, it’s a tourbillon with a ten day power reserve, all wrapped up in a triple-stepped, rectangular platinum case, with an original retail of over $376,000. Though it might not look like much to most, this thing is just about as “F*@k You” as it gets, and then some.

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